


And I Drew My Daggers

by RoryAndHannahLovePHAN



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Jealousy, Kidnapping, Phanfiction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-11
Updated: 2015-12-02
Packaged: 2018-04-25 21:39:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4977484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoryAndHannahLovePHAN/pseuds/RoryAndHannahLovePHAN
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a PHANfic where Dan and Phil are the two best assassins in the guild. When a mission goes haywire and Dan is taken, Phil has to get his recent crush back, and possibly into his bed. Can Phil get over the startlingly similar loss of his ex girlfriend enough to focus on Dan's rescue? Can he solve the mystery of his sexuality? Can he push away his new feelings toward his flatmate with enough sanity left in him to retrieve is hopefully more than friend? Can Dan sort out the situation he's in while trying to figure out his feelings for Phil?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. aDRESSing The Situation

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys, this is my first PHANfic so I hope you enjoy. Don't worry, theres no smut. Yet. See you at the bottom.

Dan's POV

God. This dress was so uncomfortable. Why did I have to be the one to wear this, why not Phil, he's the one with the Shakira hips. Shoot, I promised myself I wouldn't bring him up again, after what happened last time I started daydreaming about him. I cringed at the memory of my previous erection. Focusing at the task at hand, I surveyed the room I was in, groaning as the fake breasts I was wearing moved against my aching chest.

I heard him come up behind me, acting the part of a businessman addressing a lady. The silky fabric of his pants rubbed against my neck, making me want to strangle him. He knew my neck was off limits. Why did these chairs have to be so goddamn short? Why did he have to be so goddamn tall? He stared down at me with his dreamy iceberg blue eyes. No, I couldn't allow myself to think like that. Phil was straight. "The target's in the corner my the window," he said, his voice a seductive whisper, constantly staying in character. "Lead me out back, pretend to be extremely attracted to me." Don't have to pretend, now do you self? "Look as sexy as you can without making a fool of yourself. He'll surely follow us so be prepared to draw your weapons," Phil continued. I stood up,following his instructions, I looked at him through my wig's fringe and led him to the door closest to our target, a middle aged man of forty years or so.

Maneuvering so that my breasts were front and center, I took his hand and opened the door to the back lot. Quickly, I sidestepped out of the man's line of sight and removed my favorite daggers, my weapon of choice. I watched as Phil removed his sharpened sword from its nearly impossible to detect sheath. Three minutes after we exited the building, I hear banging on the other side of the door. It's pull, you bloody idiot. Did they have to send us, the two best fighters in the guild to kill this guy. Wait, no they didn't need to. Shit. "Phil this is a trap we need to go back, we aren't needed to kill this twat, they just wanted to lure us away from, oh shit. They're trying to take the stone." His eyes widened considerably. Without any effort he opened the door and efficiently stabbed our former target.

I tried to follow but soon realized that my dress was in the way, so I quickly removed it, my aching muscles protesting the entire ordeal. Why did we have training this morning? I'm so sore. Mountain climbs should not be a required part of the morning routine. Well at least in wearing my body suit, or I'd be naked. Not that that would be so bad with Phil around. I let that thought process go away in a rush. Running through the party we were assigned to was no easy feat, the place was crowded with businessmen too busy perving on the ladies to notice the hurry we were in.

Once out front, I stopped, momentarily dazed by Phil's amazing body gleaming in his midnight blue bodysuit. His ass was so profound, coupled with his biceps, he was every mans' dream. I was so happy he removed his costume as well, or I'd feel awkward. He turned around, facing me, thankfully causing me to refocus to the task at hand. I tried so hard not to look below his midsection, but I failed miserably. His bulge was accentuated by the tight fabric of his assassin suit. Why did he have to be straight? Even if he was gay we couldn't date. He doesn't have relationships anymore, after what happened with Mandy. He was so devastated and depressed when he found out about her kidnapping and murder. Being an assassin isn't safe for your loved ones. Too many people want revenge.

I looked up into his eyes, then realized he was staring out behind me. I quickly drew my daggers, their hilts a comfortable weight in my palms. Noticing my movement, Phil started to shake his head. This was odd behavior from Phil, he never backed down from a fight. Oh shit. This must be bad. I stared at his face, waiting for him to give something about our attacker away. That's when the bag came over my head. I'm being kidnapped, was the last thought I had before was hit and blacked out.


	2. Oblivious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil is worried. There are "memory moments", as my teacher would say

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyy. I'm back with another chapter. Phil's POV starts this one off and I'm exited to write more in his POV. This chapter is definitely longer than the last one. Chapter one was more of a setting chapter than an actual story chapter. See you at the bottom. Enjoy

Phil's POV

I was affronted by how effortlessly Dan's captor grabbed him and, in a blink of an eye, escaped unharmed. How could this happen? After last time I thought I would be immune to surprise kidnappings. They left so quickly, not even my weapon of a body could overcome their skill. This can't be happening again. Darn. What was their problem with me? Did they always have to go after my loved ones? Although we aren't in a relationship yet, Dan was still very important to me. I hope one day that this friendship will become more than just a friendship. A relationship. For a moment I allow myself to ponder this fantasy until I come back to reality. Get your head out of the gutter and focus on the kidnapping of your partner in crime, I scolded myself.

Where do I go from here? I can't go to the guild because I'd have to tell them why Dan was taken. I can't fathom what they'd do if the found out I was the reason their best killer was missing. Surely the death of a second best wouldn't hurt the overall productivity of the guild. There are plenty more of us. Shoot. I can't let what happened to Mandy happen to Dan. Of course this happens right when I start developing feelings for him. Now he'll never know that I'm not straight. And that I want him to be mine. And that I desperately want to cuddle up with him and his precious brown eyes. Perhaps we'd lay low together and have the time to ourselves. He wouldn't care about his Hobbit Hair and I wouldn't care about my lack of matching socks. Well then, if there's any chance of that happening, I'll just have to rescue him myself. But I'll need a plan. Undoubtedly he can take care of himself for a few days. I'll need to rally up a team and supplies. I've seen this before and I'm not going in empty handed.

Oh how I hope he's holding his own. Two days since the event and I still can't force my thoughts from the younger boy. Pj and Chris, friends of ours that aren't assassins but poison masterminds, can't seem to buy time to save their friend. The game hunters of the region can't get a break to help out the man that's done tons of their dirty work. Of course, the Secret Society of Women Warriors can't help us because we're "not their problem". A statement that I can't wrap my mind around since Dan had a fundraiser so they could afford instruction in the art of becoming warriors. The master warriors of the society, Master Louise, was once part of our guild. Dan even saved her life once. I've never been more annoyed. Fudge. Even in these situations I can't bring myself to swear. God, this is so much like what happened to Mandy. Why don't these people ever physically hurt me? I'm the one that killed their father. They can come after me, that would be better than losing another one of my loved ones. Or maybe I can come to them, and show them who to watch out for.

Dan's (six years earlier) POV

Fuck. Phil needs to wake up soon or we won't make it to the train. Advanced training starts in three hours and, although I don't need the extra practice, I still am required to be there. On time, too, or I'd lose my weapon choice privileges. There are two new daggers in the equipment room I'd like to get my hands on. If only Phil would wake up. He just had to be partying with Mandy last night. Ugh. Sometimes I think he'd rather hang out with her than murder idiotic sporks, for money too, with me. I even asked him about it before he went out yesterday. "Well Daniel, I'm sorry but sometimes hanging out with an eighteen year old immature assassin that is way too cocky in his line of work isn't as fun as hanging out with an innocent twenty two year old woman. I like her because she doesn't know about my profession and she doesn't make jokes about placenta and existential crisis and 'your mum'." He sounded so exasperated in his response. Like he couldn't believe that I was asking him. And now he thinks he can just sleep through a meetup that is important to me like the lil' shit he is. I'm just gonna leave him. Since he only wants to be with his girlfriend. Just before I leave I remember to at least give him a note about my whereabouts, I may be angry at him but he'll kill the entire apartment building if he finds out I left with no warning. I can trust him to do that. I can envision him murdering anyone who gets in his way if they don't give him answers. We are bestfriends. My eyes widen. Shit. I want more than that, don't I. I want to be his. That's why I hate his girlfriend. I'm fucking jealous of Mandy. Shit. I shake the thought away. I have training to do, and Phil cannot be on my mind when I'm blowing through amateurs on a practice battlefield.

When I get off the train and arrive in London, I leave through the underground's exit. After walking on the pavement for about five minutes, I spot a somewhat familiar person walking in the opposite direction as me. Coming straight toward me. That bitch. Mandy is here‽ My assassin trained hearing picks up on something else, even in the middle of a crowd. She's being followed. Oh well. She's Phil's problem. It's probably Phil after her anyway. I continue on and notice she crosses the street. I'm too focused on looking forward to the new daggers I'm about to try out that I barely notice that three people dressed in black pass by me. One has a black bag in his hand., the only thing I truly acknowledge as they pass. Thanks to the murder poisoned mind I posses, I inwardly announce that the bag looks like it could fit a human body in it, but only if it was dead or unconscious. The victim would be able to fight otherwise. I look on, my attention drawn to an opening restaurant across the street, completely oblivious to kidnapping of someone I despise just fifty meters behind me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was chapter two.Once again, my friend helped me write this. Thanks my planty friend. I I'll have the next chapter out in less than a week. Hopefully. There may be even more Memory Moments, as my teacher calls them, in the next chapter. Look forward to some more exciting story writing. I recommend you listen to Oblivion by Bastille and any songs by Troye Sivan. These songs are my current favorites and I can't help but listen to them on repeat and I suggest you do too. But anyway...
> 
> Dil with it...
> 
> -RoryLovesPHAN


	3. Six Years, Sweet Phillip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past is revealed...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyy. I'm back for a third chapter. Some more blasts from the past appear in this one and some phil POV is represented. You may notice some of Phil's favorite punctuation as well. See you at the bottom.

Mandy's POV (six years before Dan is kidnapped)

What the damn hell is going on‽ Where am I‽ Did I finally make it to the place Phil has been going lately? Is this like some sort of way to scare off those who try to find out what he's doing? Phil seemed really distracted lately. I called him over last night but he didn't come. What has been going on? Whenever I went to their flat even Dan seemed annoyed with the way Phil's been acting, but he seems to hate me more. Does he think I did this to him? Bang, bang , bang. what was that? It must be the master of the house. It is a house I'm in, right? I get up and have a true look around. The room I'm in has no windows. But, it does have a solid door. A door that is currently being pounded on by an unfamiliar guest. The banging stops and the door opens.

Whatever I was expecting, it wasn't this. The man that walks in is not decent in any way. I could tell that he was pure evil from seven miles away. His face was destroyed, it barely looked human, with scars covering the entirety of it. Neither of his eyes were part of his original pair. Plus, they were solid black. In his hand he has a hammer, in the other, a rope and two nails. "Howdy there, miss," he tries an absurdly fake American southern accent. I am not prepared for this in any way so I start to back toward the wall behind me, taking Dan's advice, back to the wall, back to the wall. "Stop," the man's voice is laced with authoritative venom. I oblige and come to a stand still. I'm not going to push my luck with this guy. I really hope Phil hasn't been coming here.

From my new location of two steps behind my original position, I can see that he has a wooden chair behind him. From here I can tell that he has other pleasantries behind him that were hidden in shadow before. In one quick motion he slides forward and ends up mere inches from my face. "What do you know about your boyfriend?" he whispers fiercely, succeeding at his attempt at intimidation towards me. Not knowing why, the words stutter out of me. "Ph-ph-phil?" By his nod of approval and his maniacal grin, I can tell that Phil's the one he's after.

"Young miss, what does your boyfriend do to pay the bills? What is his profession?" I'm so glad he dropped the fake accent, but not glad enough to not be scared shitless by this freaky man. Focusing on his question, I think back to the conversations Phil and I have had about money. I told him about my job as a waitress, and he told be about how he works at- wait, no. He didn't tell me anything. I decide to answer truthfully. "I don't know, sir" I might as well be polite, it could make him change his mind about what he's gonna do with that hammer, the tool that he's raised ever so slightly, but just enough to make me even more terrified. I don't want to get murdered today.

He raises the hammer more as he thinks over my response, as though trying to see if I'm telling the truth. He continues the ascent of the tool in his grasp. I flinch. He smiles. "That's okay sweetie, because I know. I know very well about his line of work. Your lover is an assassin, my dear. And he killed someone very important to me." This guy was capable of feeling emotion? That doesn't seem too likely. But that can't be right. My sweet little Phil is not a murderer. That's not possible. But... It would explain where he's been going and why he never shows up anymore. Does Dan know? "Focus you lil' shit" the man's voice changes to an even more menacing noise, similar to nails on a chalkboard. Speaking of nails, the ones he is holding are being placed in his other hand. The one with the hammer, the one that is raising. He stops moving his hand.

"Your little Phil, the oh-so- innocent man you've been making love to, well, sweet one, he's a murderer. He killed my father. Sure, the guild says he was just following orders. But he still carried through with them. And now little miss sunshine, you're going to pay for it." What? is the only coherent thought I have before the psychotic man raises the nails and begins to hammer into my flesh. I, in a barely conscious state, notice that he ties me up with the rope and sits me in the chair. That's when he gets out a cleaver, a scalpel, and a paper. He tugs a nail from my flesh and places the paper under it. Then, he hammers it back into me. I know that when I thankfully black out, I won't wake up.

Phil's POV (1 week after Mandy goes missing)

Dan was the last one to see her alive. He told me so two days ago. I had seen the guilt on his face days before he manned up and admitted it. I knew he had a part in this, even if he didn't commit the actual crime. I haven't been able to look at him since the reveal of his sin. I'm staying at my mum's house right now. I know Mandy's dead. In my business, if someone's missing for more than eighteen hours, then they're dead. Mandy is dead. I loved spending time with her, making love to her, and her innocent and pure mind. She took the pain away from my too many of my poor decisions. I think way too often about my mistakes. But with her, my mind was focused on normal things, things that I rarely get to focus on. Like what's for dinner, what jacket I should wear, what flowers to give to my significant other. Thanks to her death, I realize that I was playing pretend. i'll never have that perfect normal life, one that's not filled with finding the easiest way to off someone, or how to make murder seem like an accident. One where I didn't know how to tell how many people were trailing me just by their smells. Or how to conceal a weapon two feet long in a pair of swim trunks. And now I'm laying here, in bed, wondering who did it and why. The only explanation I can come up with is revenge for the many people I've killed. I'm so depressed. "Hun, come on down. The door rang but I'm on the toilet." My mum isn't one for sugar-coating things.

I schlump downstairs. And open the door. "Who is it hun?" I don't respond. Instead I sob. Mandy's mangled form rests on the doorstep, obviously placed there to send a message to me. I sob and sob and sob for what must be at least thirty minutes. I'm barely aware of my mum coming up behind me, seeing the scarring sight in front of me, then leaving. She, unlike me, was not prepared for such a lovely girl as Mandy to actually be dead. But Mum doesn't understand that this is my fault. She doesn't understand that because of my assassinations, an innocent girl has been denied the life she deserved. I look through my tears to a piece of paper nailed to her pale frame. I read it twice quickly, the read it again, trying to decipher the message written upon the cardstock.

6 Years, sweet Phillip, the scrawled handwriting says. I sob even harder. What does this mean? Why can't they be done with me? Whoever they are. My mum returns and pulls me to my feet then hands me a phone. I know who's on the other end without even looking at the number. I don't want to talk to anyone, but I still answer his questions. Dan doesn't mind the sobbing. Dan doesn't mind my state, one he's never seen or heard me in. Dan just lets me be. He lets me scream into the phone. He lets me unleash my emotions. He doesn't hang up. He just listens. I know he needs to go, but I don't let him. I need someone who understands what it's like to have a job that makes you the public enemy. I'm mad at him still, but I'm mad at everyone. After hours of speaking and screaming, my throat is raw and painful but I don't care. I knew she was dead but I wasn't prepared for the extent of her death. She mattered to me. She did.

I stand up and walk upstairs to my old room. I put on my bodysuit, one that I stole from the guild three years ago. I grab my double sided sword from my duffle bag. Wiping off the remaining tears from my face, I leave my room via the window and set off. I know what I'm going to do. I know that at least three people are going to die tonight by my hand. I know I'm doing this just for the killing calm, to get my mind away from my loss. I don't even care if my victims are idiots. I'm going to the fighting docks, and I'm going to see who can stand up to me in a brawl. I'll think about the six years note later. After I've had my killing spree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Next chapter my friend is gonna write a lot. She's good at Dan POV. I was listening to the song Oblivion by Bastille while listening to this and I used it as inspiration for Phil's POV. Next chapter look forward to Dan in the present and what the note means. Plus, some *lovely* feelings may be sorted out in the next chapter. 
> 
> Dil with it
> 
> -RoryLoves PHAN


	4. For Those With No One Left To Cry For Them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan wake up and emotional breakdowns ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyy. Still no smut so don't worry. I'm using music to channel my emotions into writing this chapter. I really like where this chapter goes so I hope you enjoy. Wow. four chapters already? Argh. Thats crazy.

Dan’s POV (present time)

Fucking hell. I awake to the sound of flies buzzing around head. Judging by the echo, I’m in a room about twelve by eight feet. Without a second thought I identify that I’m in an unfamiliar place. What I also know is that I’m in deep shit. I can feel icy metal pressing against my skin, restraining me from moving. I listen some more. No one else is in the building that I’m in. I detect no other noise except for the constant drone of the insects above me. I finally open my eyes, I see that the restraints around me are solid metal. A quick glance around tells me what I presumed, No windows, no weapons. Not even a lamp base that i could use to defend myself, if I ever got out of this trap of a chair. I am calm, my life the first priority. Years upon years of training flood through me. To escape inanimate restraint: dislocate problematic bone so you can shimmy through the opening. In this case I dislocate my shoulder. I would cry, but I barely register pain anymore, after so many life or death situations. I slip out of the metal that was holding me down and replace my scapula. The chair I was in is metal and completely connected to the floor. It’s as if the chair was part of the floor itself. I know why: my captors know of my skill. That means that they anticipated my escape of the chair. In one powerful step, I am at the door, it’s solid. No way of it budging. I smell something different on this side of the room. There’s air moving. Air conditioning is only available on the west side of town. I know because I had to smuggle one into Phil’s and my apartment. No. I shall not bring him up, especially when I need to figure out my situation first. Back to the sudden draft. It is coming strongest at my midsection. I look down and notice an extreme lack of clothing. Those shits. They must have known about my belt, the one that snaps into a sword when I remove it, but sadly it doesn’t hold my pants up too well. That means they searched me. Shit. How long was I out?   
I allow myself back to the topic of Phil. Where was he? Was he hurt after I was taken? I think back to six years ago, back when the assassins’ house still resided in this part of town. Six years ago was my last trip back here because- because Phil. He couldn’t stand coming here because this is where I last saw Mandy. Mandy. Oh no. This is what happened to Mandy. Suddenly my vision clears, my thoughts calm, and my senses sharpen. I hear a shuffle, the noise makes my heart beat faster, but I will it to slow.   
Bang, bang, bang. The booms come from the other side of the door. It opens. And in strides a man that looks like he could use a bit of a touch up. Can he even see? His eyes are glass. And they’re pitch black. He holds nothing in his hands. Unlike me, he is fully clothed.   
“How’s it going, young sir? I see you have no need for modesty. Wow. You got a girlfriend? Bet she’d like the member you got there. Oh wait, no you wouldn’t have one would you? You gay slut.” I stared at him, making sure my face gave no secrets. Keeping it impassive is no trouble at all. I stay standing. He comes in the door. Being so very polite, I step back and allow him to enter. In hand to hand combat, he’ll be no match for me, so I won’t worry. “Nice to see you escaped, I was hoping you would. My partner thought you’d be useless, but now you’ve proven yourself.” I know he’s lying. No one else has ever entered this shit hole as a “partner”. Only prisoners have been here. “Now, just so you know, I am going to kill you eventually. But, as I know, you are a very skilled man. So i’ll give you a few minutes to decide something for me, would you rather me cut off your arm or chain you to a weight of two hundred thirty kilograms. A weight that has proven inescapable by someone you know well, your guild master.” That’s where Master Norris went then, huh? The man abruptly stands up and leaves, flawlessly shutting the door in his wake. 

Phil’s POV

After I had nearly cried for a whole day and had a little killing spree, it occurred to me that I shouldn’t just sit around moping while my partner in crime is most likely in mortal danger. Fudge. Why did I have to have feelings for him? First the anger that caused me to savagely murder five innocent men and the sorrow that made me cry like a child. Feelings are something assassins should suppress, yet I can’t seem to stop letting them get in my way. Gosh darn it Phil, focus on the task at hand unless you want your friend to be brutally dissected like Mandy was. I pushed away all my thoughts and got thinking: Six years? What is the significance of this? I think about six years ago. The happy days when Mandy was still alive and well. She would always cheer me up, make me smile and laugh and when I was with her my troubles vanished. Those days of dates and kisses and sharing our pasta lady and the tramp style are are gone. Abruptly ended like her short life. Mandy. Six years ago was the year that she passed away. No. This can’t be happening; not again. They are going to recreate Mandy’s death only with Dan as the victim. And now I know the purpose of this kidnapping. Dan is both the victim and the bait but I am the set target. I am the one that they want dead. I wish I could ignore this situation, but Dan isn’t worth forgetting.

Dan’s POV:  
I let the man chain me up. This fucking weight is killing me. The man with the nauseating face just had to chain it too tight. What a spork. I know why I’m here, locked away with nothing to do. i’m bait. Bait for my best friend. Bait for my crush. At least I have plenty of time before phil inevitably comes to my rescue. Plenty of time to think about my life. Great. I’m so happy. My thoughts, naturally, wander to Phil. God, why does he have to be straight? Sometimes I catch him looking at me as if there could truly be something between us, but then he goes off to stare at some lady that passes by our flat. I’m so hopeless. I’ve been thinking about the day we met, me and Phil, he was my idol, a face that was worth looking up to. I was an orphan and sometimes I’d see Phil wandering through the neighborhood. When he had company with him on these walks, I could see the pure lack of empathy or even sympathy of the others faces. But Phil could always spare a smile for little kids that crossed his path, he would tell them that everything would, eventually, be fine. He told us stories. He told us jokes. The day that Master Norris brought me into the guild and told me of my potential, I saw Phil, I was taken aback by the realization that this was where he was always headed as he passed by my shambles of a shelter. I was eight, he was twelve. And although I didn’t know that one day we would be best friends and amazing partners in our extreme lifes, I saw a familiar face with an incredible and caring expression. The first words out of his mouth when he saw me were: “I’ll watch him.” He did. He watched over me and made sure I was training effectively and that I was comfortable and not rushed. Since I was fifteen, I think I’ve known that I wanted to be his. That his sweet innocent smile could hopefully become a smile I got to see constantly. I miss Phil. I miss that Phil. That was before he killed that kid’s father. That was before Mandy. Now he’s all business and I never see that fantasy of a smile. His cheekbones and black hair. He only dyes it to blend in with the night on missions, but I like him with any color. He deserves a life that he wants. A life filled with people who are better that I’ll ever be. Ones who can crack jokes and spin tales and care for one another. I can’t even say “thank you” to those who offer me help. I just look on and walk away. I close my eyes and feel my cheeks wet. No. I will not cry for the monster that I am. The broken, immoral being that resides in my chest. The one that values others’ pain and keeps record of my dirtiest sins. I want to believe that I can be sweet and forgiving. But I’m only able to do that with Phil. And I know he’ll never love me back. Shit. I take a deep breath and look towards the ceiling, as if staring at a God that most likely is ashamed of me could help me recover my sanity. It doesn’t happen. More tears well in my eyes. I let them fall. I need to cry for those I’ve killed for so many of them don’t have anyone left to cry for them. Those murdered by my hand should receive at least a little bit of love. I have never had that opportunity. No one loves me. For a while, Phil had Mandy. Pj and Chris have each other and a passion for poison. Master Norris had a wife. I have no one, had no one. No family, no lovers. Only a love for blood spilled and a dream to see a smile that seems to have vanished from the world have kept me running all this time. I want to hug Phil, to make sure he never feels the way I do now. I can’t stand it if he ever feels like this. If he ever does, I’ll murder the son of a bitch that does this to him. I’ll always be there for Phil, a shoulder to lean on, a strong shelter in the storm. I, from here on out, will protect my friend and elder for as long as l live. And he will just have to break me out of this horrid holding cell. That shouldn’t be a problem, the two of us working side by side again are match for anyone. As long as he doesn’t freeze up again like he did on that night, when he was too consumed in disbelief to react. Seeing someone who undoubtedly killed the first person you’d ever loved can’t be easy. And that will not happen to Phil. Ever again. Not as long as I’m here.  
And that’s when I see a dagger thrown down from above come sailing down from a new gap in the ceiling. A dagger with a hilt I’ll always recognize. One specially given to me by Phil for my sixteenth birthday, with the closest thing to a hopeful message I’ve ever received engraved into the hilt. Phil. I smile and lift my face up to look at the special and wonderful man clad in back as he repels from the ceiling in complete silence with a huge, one in a lifetime grin plastered to his perfect face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! A new chapter will come pretty soon so don't fret. i'm planning on some smut soon so be prepared. It might not be next chapter though btw. My friend is still helping with ideas and is editing for me so thanks my friend with a closet filled with confessions and a love for highfiving with wood. ;)) you know what I'm talking about.... I finished TABINOF the day it was released (the thirteenth) and took way to many screenshots. Whoops. But in all seriousness I am really excited to keep writing this story. Thanks to everyone who reads my story and leave kudos! I never thought anyone would actually read this so thank you. It means a lot.


	5. Birthday Daggers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil is Dan's savior.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyy, I'm back. Sorry for my lack of uptating but it was my birthday on Saturday and I have plenty of school work that still needs to be done. Oh well. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter, even if it is little bit short.

Dan’s POV:

I smile so brightly I’m sure the sun is jealous. Phil is here. My savior. He smiles back at me and I swear I can see some newfound happiness in his eyes. He is still silently staring me down when we hear shuffling coming from outside. Shit. His face immediately goes into super serious mode as he slips to the floor. With a pick he undoes my shackle and my wrist immediately feels relief. I’m so happy that, for a moment, I forget the circumstances and quietly pronounce, “I love you Phil.”  
Oh no. Phil looks up from my released metal trap and stares me in the eyes. Crap, he heard me. No, no, no. He holds me captive in his eyes, he seems to be searching depths of my very soul to see if I meant it. That’s when his mouth starts to curve into a smile and he leans in and gives me a fleeting smooch. I’m taken aback but immediately regret the speed at which the kiss ended. His lips tasted sweet like sugar. Phil’s eyes find mine again and I can see the promise hidden in his gaze. He wants more of me, and I of him, but first, we need to escape. We both hear it, someone is trying, but failing, to shuffle silently down the hall. It’s not to easy to sneak up on assassins that have been training for the majority of their lives. I grab my dagger from its forgotten place on the floor next to me. I stand up and slide away from Phil in complete silence. Using the line that Phil had used to enter my cell, I start to climb into the ceiling, barely noticing the ache in my wrists left over from my confining restraints. Wasting no time, Phil comes up behind me, also dead silent. Once we’re in the ceiling, I replace the tile that had been removed initially. We continue moving in the crawl space and end up at an exit. “Wow, Phil. You’ve outdone yourself.” He smiles at me as I jump down to the main floor exit.  
And the we hear, “No one move.” The man with the monstrosity of a face and a jet black eye has found us. But instead of listening to the man, we run. We don’t stop. No, we run and run and run, until we reach the end of the hallway that we initially landed in. We run around the corner and, of course, right into a man that looks to be a guard of sorts. Without a second glance, I hurtle my dagger into the man’s face and continue on our path. I guess the man really did have partners working for him. Phil, noticing my lack of weaponry, throws me a machete he was carrying in a hidden sheath in his ultimate assassin suit. Fuck. I liked that dagger. Too bad I had to waste it on that guy’s face. I take Phil’s blade and ask, “How much farther?” “Not to much farther, just take a left up here and we should be at a set of doors leading to a forest, a perfect getaway location,” is his response. We round the corner and there, fifty feet ahead of us, is a set of double doors. But instead of running through them, Phil takes my arm and stops me. I don’t question him since he’s the one who planned this, not me. Using sign language, a required language to learn for assassins, he tells me that he wants to kill the man. The one who undoubtedly killed his first love. And he wants to do it, not me. I nod my head, he can do it. I sign back that we should wait back at the corner and jump him when he comes running through. He smiles and tells me that I’ll cover him and offer backup, but only if necessary, he’s the one who needs to kill this son of a bitch.  
We hear footsteps coming in our direction and ready our weapons. Phil is the most skilled swordsman the guild has ever had, so with his trusty blade, he will dominate this man in a fraction of a second. The man rounds the corner, and suddenly, there’s a metal form jutting out of his gut, the sword that Phil placed there. I pop out of my hidey hole and clear the rest of the floor. No one else is here, and we’re free to go. After regaining ownership of my birthday gift from a dead man’s face, I walk back toward Phil. He’s kneeled on the ground, in front of perished enemy.  
“I thought it would take longer. No, I wanted it to take longer, longer for me to kill this baste- barnacle. Gosh darn it why can’t I allow myself to swear? Argh. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Oh God, finally.” He says the last part quietly because he starts to tear up. “Hey Phil, don’t cry. We need to get back to the flat then we can work all of this out.” Phil just nods his head, and he stands up so he can lead me away from this hell of a place and into the comfort of our flat, where he can let his tears fall freely, and we can work out what we are. 

Phil’s POV (one day before the rescue of Dan):

“Chris, jeez. Why can’t you help me get Dan?” I’m on the phone with our poison buddy, who, at the moment is only able to offer moral support, instead of the desired physical help that is needed to rescue Dan. “I’m working right now and it’s important, but I can help you emotionally, if you’d like.”  
“I don’t need this kind of assistance, Chris. I need you to help me rescue him.” Jeez, why can’t he understand? “Hey, hey, hey, before you get all pissy, I know that you like him.” My eyes undoubtedly widen. “Uhm, uhm well, yeah Chris, of course I like him, we-we’re best friends.” Well, it’s not my best lie, that's for sure. “Yeah right. You know what I meant. You love him, and you know it. Don’t bother lying to me, I’m smarter than that. And I’m here to tell you that instead of wasting your time waiting for someone to come forward and help you break him out, you need to get your badass training mindset back into place and retrieve him yourself, before he rots and ends up on your doorstep like the last person you allowed yourself to love. I understand that ‘he had training to so he’ll survive longer than she who shall not be named’ but you need to get off of you goddamn sofa and save a boy who is just as in love with you as you are with him…. Okay?”  
What? “He loves me? Chris, take a step back and tell me, does Dan love me?” No, it can’t be true. He can’t love me. He thinks I’m heterosexual so why would he love me. “Ugh,” Chris’s heavy breath is audible. “Yes, Phil. Dan came to Peej one day and told him. So, of course, Peej told me. Dan is in love with you and you’re too caught up in doubt to notice it. So you better hop off your high horse of ignorance and start acting like you used to. When you weren’t afraid of anything or anyone and you always had a smile available for those who crossed your path.”  
Slightly smiling at Chris’s enthusiasm, I decide it’s time I let my guard down and do what I want. And all I want right now is to get Dan out of a trap he’s been caught in for longer than he’d realized. “Okay, Chris. I’ll go and get him!” I can hear his sigh of relief. “Thank god. Oh and I have recently received trustable intel as to Dan’s whereabouts. Just so you know.”  
“Why didn’t you tell me that to begin with, Chris‽” My screams of outrage cause a pigeon to fly away from the perch outside our flat that it was resting on. “I wanted to make sure you had an actual use for the information I’m about to give you. Thanks for agreeing, by the way. Anyway, he’s on the other side of town, near where the old guild was. I’ll send you a link to his coordinates.” I end the call and stand up from the green chair I was resting on. I grab my coat, It’s gonna be a long walk to the weapon room at the guild. But when I get there, I know just what I’m gonna grab. My birthday gift to Dan for his sixteenth birthday should do the trick.  
As I leave the weapon room, with a sly smile on my lips and a full body assassin suit on my frame, I walk toward the prison my friend is in and shed the skin my former self was in. I walk forward with a new purpose and a zazz that I haven’t allowed myself to recall for years and years. My friend is going to be saved today. And a new lover is going to be made.  
I look up and realize, that I’m here and my reason for living is waiting inside for me. I look back down, and get to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey. Next chapter will be about Dan and Phil sorting out their feelings for one another, possibly in the bedroom. IDK if next chapter will be smut but I'll see if that happens. Don't worry though, i'll warn you if it does. My friend helped me write some of this again but the won't get herself invited so we could be formerly known as co-authors. Ugh. Well anyway, thanks for all the hits and kudos. It's kind of crazy, I didn't think anyone would actually read this. 
> 
> Dil with it
> 
> -RoryLovesPHAN


	6. Pheelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's pretty short so sorry, but writer's block is really good at hitting at the worst moments. Anyway, enjoy!

Dan’s POV:

I sleep. I sleep and sleep and sleep. On the couch, in my bed, on the floor next to Phil. We haven’t talked. Not yet. In fact, we only speak to each other to order food, or to say a simple, “goodnight.” Not much more than that. All I do is sleep it seems, and eat, of course. Being held hostage does a lot to a person. So I get my rest. I don’t see much of Phil and it’s easy to tell that he’s running around on errands just to stay away from me, and, even if he doesn’t want to believe it, his feelings. I consider getting up from my current location of the couch, but before I can figure out the linguistics of that intense mission, I start to drift off. 

Phil’s POV:

I return to Dan, who’s still asleep. Oh God, how much I want to wake him, wake him to the smell of fresh pancakes and a kiss on the lips. I wish he would wake up, just so I could see his endless eyes, filled to the brim with secrets that could last me a lifetime trying to decode and swim through. A lifetime that I could instead spend with the mind behind those eyes. Daniel James Howell. Daniel James fudging Howell. The man of my dreams. The man that supposedly loves me back. I need to know. It’s decided, if he’s not up by five o’clock, then I’ll wake him up. Just so I can learn the truth.

Five. It’s finally five o’clock and I can force him to rise. He’s snuggled up in his blanket, all cozy and warm. He smiles, most likely having a good dream. I waltz to his front side and gently place my hands under the afghan encasing his spectacular and agile and young body. The body that I need. A body that I need to tell me it’s many secrets. But not until he’s awake. Yanking off the soft, woven cloth seemed to do the trick, since as soon as I removed it, purposefully rubbing my hand against his chest as I grabbed hold of the blanket, he woke up, still sleepy from his slumber. If this doesn’t go the way I want it to, at least I had that little caress there.   
He sits up and I sit down, so we’re at the same level. “What’s up, Phil,” the most he’s said to me since we returned. All he’s been doing is sleeping. “I-I I wanted to talk to you, to you-you know, um, discuss, um, things. And, you know, um, what we are. To each other. Yeah.” Wow. Great job self. Didn’t know just how much he made you stumble, did you? He wipes the sleep from his eyes and stretches, giving me a full view of his abs as his shirt lifts up. I gulp, staring at them. He notices, and smiles. His smile makes me smile. But I take it a step further, and I laugh a little, just a chuckle. He drops the smile and stares me down intensely. Did I do something wrong, I wonder hurriedly. I search his face for answers, but all i get is his cute little laugh, the one he lets almost no one here, especially when he’s working, in return. Thank goodness i didn’t do something wrong, though. I struggle to find my figurative footing as I continue to stare into his eyes as he finishes his laughing fit. Once finished, he gets serious, acknowledging the importance of the conversation we’re about to have.   
“Well,” I start, “I’ve recently realized that for the majority of my life I’ve been living a lie and I'm actually gay. And that all that time I’ve known you I secretly been falling in love with you, and not even letting myself recognize it as love. Sometimes I would even let myself wonder what it would be like if you loved me back. I know that you’re gay, but you didn’t know I was. Looking back, I realized also that, even though,” I sigh heavily, letting her name slip out of my mouth after having only thought those two syllables for far too long, “Mandy was a great person, she was just a filler, and, I’ll admit sex was great, but I would still fantasize about what it would be like with you. You came to the guild scared and alone, and my will to protect you had never been stronger. I didn’t realize that I had been too busy trying to protect myself from loving you to tell that maybe you were starting to fall for me too.”  
Dan stares me down, thinking about my confession. I don’t know how I didn’t stumble through that intense proclamation but i didn’t so… yay? But what if he doesn’t accept me? I know he kissed me but he was tired and groggy from being held hostage so his judgment could have very well been clouded. He’s well rested now at least. He looks into my eyes as if trying to find the right thing to say.   
But instead of the “oh Phil, I’m sorry but I never thought about you like that,” that i was expecting, I received a smooch. Quick and effortless, like we’d been doing that same kiss for years. He leans back, tilts his head, smiles and then comes back for more. His lips against mine feel like heaven that’s been dipped in sugar and filled with gold. I reach for breath and he releases me from his mouth. “So, you are in love with me?” He smiles at my question. “Of course, Philly. And, um, I know we just started kissing and stuff but, like you assumed, I’ve wanted to do this since I was about fifteen, so um, can we, you know, take it to the bedroom? I mean, we don’t really have to get to know each other, right? We already know that stuff and I really want to know a little more about the physical side of you, Philly.”  
My smile widened. Without responding verbally, I nod my head, grab his hand, and lead him to my room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey. So you may have noticed my username has changed and that is because this account is now officially a shared account! My friend, Hannah, and I will be posting from this account, even though this is mainly my story. Next chapter will have smut so if thats not what your into then you can skip ahead, I should upload a not smut chapter at the same time. Anyway...
> 
> Dil with it  
> -RoryAndHannahLovePHAN


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ///WARNING///:  
> This is bad smut. like i wouldn't even count it as smut. Had to keep it *cleaner* then what I wanted to write because of the rating this is under and the possibility of my mom finding it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so, I have no excuse for my schedule. 
> 
> Anyway, here is the promised smut chapter! It is absolutely terrible btw. I'm so sorry. But, I share this computer with my mother so I couldn't risk the possibility of her finding this on our computer. If you don't want to read bad smut, then don't read this chapter. Next one should be soon (er than last time).

Phil’s POV:

He pushes me back. Sweat already covering his face. And, oh, God is it sexy. He keeps pushing his already hard crotch directly into mine. Making out has never been better. He removes his face for mine and immediately I long for him and his presence on me. He smiles, seeing my desperation and quickly removes his shirt. And Oh god, his fourteen years trained muscles are practically begging for me to rub my hands all over them. And lower areas. I slip off my shirt as he removes his pants. I don’t remove mine. Instead, I stand up, take off my belt and wait. “What is it?” Dan asks, a concerned look radiating from his perfect face. “Nothing, Dan,” I respond. “I want you to take my pants off, but with your mouth.” His eyes brighten as I pull out the mischievous side of him. “Oh course, Philly.” He smirks, gets down on his knees and bites down on the top of my black, skin tight jeans. But instead of pulling downward, he moves his mouth to get in a better position; right in front of my crotch. Now, he starts pulling my jeans away from the skin, and without warning, grabs my ass in his hands, pushing my crotch right into his face. He’s teasing me, knowing how much I love a good blow job from the stories I tell him of my younger years. I try to resist, but I moan into him anyways, my cock growing harder by the second. “Mmmmdannnn.” My moan causes him to press me harder into him. “Quit teasing me,Bear,” I say in between breaths. “I’ve wanted to do this for a long time so I think I deserve a bit of playtime before.” He’s finished. My pants are off. Before I can complain, he pushes me back onto my bed and straddles me, regaining our previous make-out stance. He keeps grinding into me. Oh God its euphoric just having him near me. I’m having too much fu-  
I don’t get to finish because now Dan is strangling me. Without thinking I dislodge him from my throat, that’s what happens when your own trainer chokes you in training, you learn to dislodge stronger and better looking men from your neck. “What was that?” I exclaim. “Oh that,” he says “was just a little fun, I thought you would expect me to be naughty in the bedroom. And by the way, I have to report you to the guild for attempting to dislodge your superior. You know what the guild thinks about rankings; that they determine your worth.”  
“Oh really, because Bear, I have to report you to the guild because you attempted to harm your elder. I am the second oldest in the organization, so I could get you into some trouble.”  
“Well, how about you get me into some trouble now?” I start to take off my overly cheery boxers as he says this, already thinking the same thing. He takes his off as well. “Since I’m older-” He interrupts me then, “You’re on top.” He finishes for me. I don't even need to tell him and he’s getting onto his knees, turned away from me. I grab the condom and the lube, and get to work. 

***LALALA SEX HAPPENS HERE ***

Oh, its euphoric, my vision is blurred as I climb down from the summit of Mt. Orgasm. “Oh, Dan.” I look over to him, my vision already cleared, to see the younger man still high from his own orgasm. “Well then, Bear, looks like we’ll have to do this again sometime.” He doesn’t respond, still in his happy place. “Alright then, how ‘bout tomorrow?”  
All I get is a nod of approval before he falls asleep next to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heey so yah ik it was bad, next chapter should be better. I hope.
> 
> I get Blue Neighbourhood (By Troye Sivan) of friday the fourth so I can't wait. Plus a new episode of Noragami yay. Pinof 7 was better than I could've ever hoped for and New season of AoT starts April 16 aghghh can't wait.
> 
> Dil with it,  
> RoryandHannahLovePHAN

**Author's Note:**

> This was a short chapter but I will be coming out with a 2nd chapter soon, I hope you enjoyed... My friend and I will be working on Phil's perspective next so it should be an interesting change. I've made it so that Phil never swears, I'm trying to keep it closer to reality. We are taking a smidge of inspiration from the book Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas but the plot definitely becomes more unique the more we write. We'll try to be humorous throughout the story. Look forward to more info about Dan's kidnapping. I hope you read more. Thank you.
> 
> Dil with it...
> 
> -RoryLovesPHAN


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